My name is Kathy and while I know I would be a fantastic employee and a worth-while investment for your company, previous experience would indicate that this is impossible to convey in a cover letter. Perhaps that is a reflection of my writing skills, as a talented enough writer would easily be able to communicate their extraordinary qualities as a candidate for the currently open position. I honestly do not care anymore, because the current job market and, more specifically, the lack of prospects for someone who has exceptionally completed everything they were told to do to succeed, is rather soul-crushing, and right now all I want to do is find whatever work I can to begin paying back my student loans.
I am passionate, diligent, and believe in myself. I know who I am, which if you know any twenty-two year olds, is more than most of today’s youth can say. Whether or not you find this letter to be convincing, offensive, or a joke, is not really my concern. The cover letter I used to send out was no less honest than this one: sentence after sentence of sincere interest in potential employers, followed by the truth: that I can handle the job and would be an ideal candidate. However, having received glacial reception from the professional world, I have since tossed that cover letter, and am now opting for a different brand of honesty.
Should you find that my qualifications in the provided resume suit your needs, or, more succinctly, if you are looking for a great employee, I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you for your time in reading this.
Sincerely,
Kathy
